Burning for You: A Steamy Older Man Younger Woman Romance Read online

  *

  The party is in full swing when I arrive at Stephanie's house. It's a couple of years since I've been there. The place is stuffed to the rafters with all Stephanie's family and friends as if it was her party, and not Katie's.

  I feel like I've been invited for them all to check me out—the absent father, as if it was my fault I wasn't there every day when Katie was growing up.

  Frank is not here. What gives? No one is saying anything about it. Not that I care about him these days. I cared enough for ten of us sixteen years ago, but to be fair Stephanie was never right for me. We both knew that, even then. But she took my daughter away. That nearly broke me.

  After what feels like an hour of polite conversation, trapped by Katie's aunt Maggie and Jim from the house on the corner, and nothing to sustain me but a few snacks and punch so strong I'm glad I walked here rather than brought the car, I give a speech about how well Katie has done and how she makes me happy to be her dad. My daughter gives me a big hug, tears in her eyes.

  It's only then that I spot Gemma. She must have arrived while I was being lectured about house prices and the need to prune hydrangeas. She's clapping, watching us, watching me. Is there something else to that look other than her watching a family moment? I think there is. I catch her eye. She blushes and looks away.

  Evading the other neighbors and relatives, I look for Katie's fiancé and shake Rob's hand. I like him. He'll be good for Katie. I hope she'll be happier with him than I was with her mother. I don't see many of Katie's other friends though, and no plus one for Gemma. Maybe Mr. Hot Wheels wasn't invited. That might be because there isn't much room for people Katie's age with Stephanie's cohorts taking up residence everywhere in the living room and kitchen. I'll slip Katie some money so she can celebrate with her friends another night. I'm sure this can't be her cup of tea exactly. It's not mine either.

  It's too hot in the house. Stephanie keeps the place like a greenhouse, as if she were some fragile flower unable to exist at normal room temperature. When there's a lull, I wander out into the back garden. There's still snow on the ground and it's dark, but it's a relief to get out of the cloying atmosphere of the party. The garden is large for a suburban house – you can just see the house next door through the trees— Gemma's house. Clearly, the girls were destined to be friends from day one.

  “Too hot in there for you, too?” Gemma comes out from the shadows. I didn't see her slip out. It looks like we are the only two out there.

  “Yes, I don't know how Katie stood it before she moved out. It must have been good training for slaving over the ovens at the bakery.” I smile at Gemma. I should go back in, but I don't. It's as if all sense has deserted me. “Fallen into any pies lately?”

  “No, not lately.” She laughs. “Though I had an encounter with a blueberry cheesecake yesterday. I think I got the better of it.”

  “Careful with that,” I say indicating the glass of punch she's clinging to, a mountain of fruit floating on top of it. “I think they'll all be singing in there soon, the way Stephanie is dishing it out.”

  “I know. Lethal, isn't it? It tastes of nothing but fruit juice but Katie says there's a bottle of vodka in it. She said her mum thinks the addition of fruit makes it a health drink. One of your five a day. She had to keep the kids from getting hold of it.”

  I take the glass from Gemma's hand and put it down on the garden table. She doesn’t need any more of that crap. But there’s more to it than that. Hell! I admit it. I want to hold her and that glass is in the way.

  She seems to take fright. “I'd better go back in.”

  “Wait!” I say. I can't help myself. I don't want her to go inside. She bites her lip. Do I make her nervous? I'd like to bite that lip. Maybe she should be nervous around me.

  “Did your boyfriend get a new car?”

  “Probably.”

  “You don't know? Did you get a new boyfriend with better driving skills instead?”

  “No, but I'll make sure anyone who applies for the role has been on an advanced driving course.”

  “You could have died. You were so close to that tree.” I hold my hands three inches apart. “This close in fact.”

  “I know. I have nightmares about that.”

  My mind immediately switches to an image of Gemma in her bed. What can I say? I have no willpower or sense. Fuck! I'd like to chase those nightmares away. I could think of a hundred things I'd like to do to her to take her mind right off that accident.

  “Sorry to bring it up, but I just wanted to make sure that you were safe if you were still letting Hot Wheels drive you around.”

  “Thanks,” she says. “There's no need. I'm only driving myself around these days— myself and cakes—and I have enough trouble with them. So I drive very slowly, otherwise it won't be a tree but Katie who kills me.” We laugh. “Oh, I forgot. I have your hoodie next door. All clean again. I'll just go and get it.”

  It's as if she can't wait to escape from me. She's biting her lip again. It sends a jolt to my cock. I'm not sure what it is about this girl but she has me in some kind of spell, one that detaches my brain from the rest of me. I follow her around to the side of the house and reach out for her wrist. “No need to get it right now.” She looks up at me, blushing but she doesn't pull her hand away.

  “Do I make you nervous?” I ask.

  “No, I...er...”

  I pull her to me and kiss her, just a gentle brush with my lips on hers at first. Her eyes open wide as if she wasn't expecting that, but then she smiles, and I lean down for another kiss, more intense this time, her soft lips responding to mine, her eyes closing just before mine.

  We lose ourselves in the moment and she's against the brick wall of the house somehow and we're pressed against each other, the softness of her body and the delicate fruity-flowery scent of her driving me crazy, making me hard for her.

  I suck her lower lip, tasting again the fruit of the punch, and she gasps as my hands pull her to me so there's not a hair's breadth between us and I plant a line of kisses down her neck. She moans into my hair.

  We're hidden here at the side of the house. It's just as well. Somehow, I think there is a house full of people who wouldn't approve of the urgency and heat of that kiss.

  CHAPTER 3

  Gemma

  Wow! I never knew anything could feel so hot in a freezing cold back garden in the middle of December. Maybe I've had too much of Stephanie's punch but it's not just that. It's Ben. His body. The man scent of him—soap and a hint of cologne and pure Ben. The way he holds me without hesitation. Those kisses that are all encompassing, all engulfing, the slight grazing of his stubble against my cheek, his strong arms around me. I'm eager for more.

  His fingers tangle in my hair as he bends for another kiss. He groans as his lips find mine and I crush my mouth to his, opening my lips to him. There's nothing gentle or tentative about that kiss. If I thought he was hot before tonight, his heat level just went up a thousand degrees, no two thousand.

  When we break apart, we're short of breath and my heart is thudding. I wonder if he could feel it beating in my chest.

  “That was…surprising,” he says, “in a good way.”

  “Yes, good.” My vocabulary has deserted me. Every word for it other than “good” escapes me.

  He takes hold of my hand. “I'd like to see you again, take you out.”

  “Yes, I'd like that.” What else can I say? I can't wait to see him again. But what am I doing? What will Katie say? I can't tell her. No way. She worships her dad.

  “But Katie...” I say, pulling my hand away from him.

  “What about her?”

  “She won't like this.”

  “No,” he says. “Maybe not at first, but she's got a good head on her shoulders. She's not going to freak out about it once she thinks about it.”

  “Maybe not.” I'm not sure about that. I think he underestimates how weird this is going to be for her. “In any case, we can't say anything today. It'
s her birthday. We should go in. I don't want to wreck her party for her.”

  “Fuck, you're right. But before we go into the heatwave...”

  He pulls me to him and kisses me again as if he can't help wanting me one more time, and he knows it's the last kiss before he can arrange to see me again—a fierce kiss, one that sweeps every worry away until I can only think of Ben and his mouth on mine.

  “I'll call you,” he says. “Give me your number.”

  He puts my details in his phone. “We'd better go in now, honey bun.” He pats the messy bun on the top of my head. “I like that,” he says, “suits you.” Then he runs his thumb over my cheek as if he regrets having to leave things there.

  “I'll just go and get your hoodie.”

  “Okay,” he says, and goes inside.

  Just as well he leaves then. I feel all shaky at what just happened, as if a tornado blew through the garden and left me in a heap of rubble. But shit! What was I thinking? I can't keep away from this guy now. I just can't. What will I say to Katie?

  I can just imagine her reaction if I say, “You know you said there were all these hot guys at the fire station and you sent me there to check them out? Well I found the best of them all—your dad. And he wants to take me out.”

  Eek no. How would I feel if it was Katie and my dad? But my mind can't get around that one. My dad is so much older than Katie's and he looks so much older too. Katie's dad is hot by any yardstick. And I giggle at the thought of yardstick because of what I felt against me when we were pressed against the house wall. Holy smokes. And the way he kisses! I've never been kissed like that before.

  Bertie, faithful mutt, my gorgeous black and white cross between a terrier and a poodle, leaps up at me when I go into my house. He probably needs a walk, but now is so not the time. I want to get back to the party. Even if I can't be with Ben, I want to see him.

  “Sorry, I can't take you now, Bertie-boy.” I rub his ears and let him out into the garden while I fetch Ben's sweatshirt and put it in a bag.

  When I return to the party with the hoodie, I hand it to Ben and he says thank you as if there was nothing at all between us. Only a twinkle in his eye betrays him and a lingering touch as he takes the bag.

  “What's this?” Katie says, handing me another drink. I must have left my glass outside. That fruity punch seems more potent than ever. Goodness knows what Stephanie has added to it now. I swear the decibel level has gone up by a factor of five since I went outside. There are a lot of people looking unsteady on their feet, and not because they're over eighty.

  “I ...er...had an accident with one of the cupcakes at the fire station. Had to borrow a top.” I'm blushing.

  “You goof,” she says, giving me a hug and laughing. “You and cake. I don't think you're destined to be around it for long without getting covered in frosting.” And she gets pulled away by her cousin who just arrived.

  “That I'd like to see,” Ben whispers. “You covered in frosting ready to be licked off. A man could die and go to heaven.”

  I burst out laughing and choke on my drink.

  He pats my back and then my ass. I gasp but when I look around no one can see us. We are tucked into a corner.

  “I'm going to have to leave you while I'm still able,” Ben says. “I'll call you, though.”

  *

  Two days go by and he doesn't call. Maybe it's for the best. But it hurts because those kisses felt so real. Somehow I expected something more from him, like he cared or something. It seems like some lessons just need to be learned over and over until I get the message drummed into my thick head.

  At least Bertie is always faithful. The bakery is closed Sundays, so I take him for a long walk in the woods over by the burn. It's beautiful despite the cold. The snow has just melted but there are little patches of white lingering everywhere, and I'm glad of my winter coat. I have my camera with me and I want to take some pictures while it's quiet. I get some great shots of the wood and close-ups of the snow melting off the trees, as well as some of Bertie exploring the undergrowth and rolling around, enjoying the fresh air.

  Suddenly his ears prick up. It must be another dog getting him excited. And sure enough, a chocolate brown Labrador comes bounding through the trees and the dogs circle around each other, sniffing nose to tail.

  Bertie crouches down, butt up the air, tail wagging, and the brown Lab does the same. They want to play! They pounce on each other, wrestling on the ground like they were both still puppies. With all that rolling around in the mud, I see a clean-up job in my future. I just hope Mum has enough old towels to cope with the mess when we get home.

  “Hey, Sullivan.” I hear the dog's owner, coming through the trees. “Sorry, he just ran off. Oh, it's you.”

  I look up from the dogs and see the last person I expected to see—Ben. No wonder he sounded familiar just now. He looks sheepish but he's smiling. Is he happy to see me? I think so but I'm not sure.

  “I didn't know you had a dog. Katie never mentioned one.” I'm trying to keep my cool while feeling anything but.

  “I didn't until a week ago. I'm just getting used to him. Sullivan got too much for my neighbor Reg, so I've been walking him when I can, and now the old boy has had to go into a home where he can't take Sullivan so I said I'd look after him.”

  I want to ask Ben why he didn't call, but of course I don't. We just watch the dogs playing. They're running around the trees as if they were playing tag, back and forth, catch me if you can.

  “They're having a real bromance there,” Ben says.

  “They're behaving like puppies.”

  “It must be love.”

  “You didn't call.” Did I say that out loud? Fuck! I did.

  “No. Sorry. I got to thinking. Maybe we both had more of that punch than was good for us and I came on a bit strong at the party. I thought I might have made a nuisance of myself in an embarrassing way. You know in a 'my best friend's dad was all over me' kind of way.” He looks at me for my reaction.

  “No. Not how I remember it. I liked it.”

  He smiles again then, a big beaming smile as if I gave him a gift. He takes my hand and squeezes it. He notices the camera. “You've been taking pictures?”

  “Yes. I've got enough now, I think.”

  A drop of melted ice falls from the tree and plops down the back of my neck. I shudder.

  “You're cold? Do you want to come back to my place? I'm a master of Cadbury's and hot milk. I might even be persuaded to go mad and top it with marshmallows.”

  “I'd love that.”

  “In that case, let's take these muddy mutts home.”

  “They're going to make an awful mess. Look at them.”

  “Yes, but I'll cope. They're no worse than me after a game.”

  “You play football?”

  “No. Rugby, when I get the chance. The station has a team.”

  My breath catches at the thought Ben wrestling in the mud with the guys, grabbing the ball, scoring a touchdown. I'd better stop that line of thinking before I combust.

  Ben's cottage is not far from the wood, but it's on the other side of the village. I've never been there in all the years I've known Katie. It's quaint, cozy even, not quite what I was expecting. I thought he'd have a modern bachelor pad in Blackbridge, a loft apartment or something. But I should have known, because I knew he didn't live far away and there's nothing like that around here.

  We go in by the back door into a utility room. He has towels on the floor for the dogs and we scoop them around our pets and blot off the worst of the mud. Ben brings a couple of water bowls and snacks, and the animals gobble them down and chew away as if they haven't seen a meal in weeks.

  We kick off our boots and pad into the kitchen where it's toasty warm after our freezing cold walk. I feel the blood coming back to my cheeks…or maybe that's just from being so close to Ben as we looked after the dogs.

  He takes my coat and I feel a tingle up my spine at his touch. There's no one here now, no
one to hide from, just us and the dogs. He hangs my coat up in the hall.

  “Make yourself at home,” he says, indicating a bentwood chair around the scrubbed pine kitchen table. He has a nice place. It feels warm and welcoming, as if he's made a proper home for himself. But there's no sign of Christmas, and the big day is less than a week away.

  Is there a woman's touch here? I don't think so. It's pure man in the choice of colors and furniture, but it's still comfortable. Katie has never mentioned her dad having a partner as far as I remember. And I would have remembered that, wouldn't I? But a guy like him hasn't been alone all these years for sure, even if no one ever moved in.

  I watch him as he boils the kettle and gets the mugs out. I can hardly believe I'm sitting in his kitchen. I'm hoping he's not just going to make me a hot drink and send me on my way. My pulse is racing now I don't have Bertie to focus on. My mind is all on Ben.

  He brings me the hot chocolate with mini mallows bobbing on top. I grab the mug, warming my hands.

  “Thanks,” I say.

  “Do you walk your dog a lot around here?”

  “A fair bit. When I have time for a longer walk.” I'm going to walk in these woods more often, now I know I might bump into him.

  “It's just, I'm going to have to find a dog walking service for Sullivan when I'm working. I don't suppose you want another job?”

  “I'd love to help out.” I'd be happy to do it anyway, but I know it means we'll stay in touch, and my heart sings.

  “You're on then. I'm on night shift four days next week. Can you start Tuesday? I know it's close to Christmas and you're probably busy but...”

  “No, it's okay. I can do it. I don't suppose you get Christmas off with what you do.”

  “No, candles and Christmas decorations don't mix but people think they do.”

  “Is that why you don't have any? Christmas decorations, I mean?”

  “No, I just never got around to it. I'll be at the station Christmas Day anyway. Did you not see our decorations there? Very tasteful.”