His Alone (First Loves Duet Book 2) Read online

  “It does, but…”

  “But what?”

  “Has it affected your relationships outside of work?”

  James gave me a long, hard look before his lips rose at the corners, forming a sly smile.

  “You mean has it affected my dating life.”

  It was a statement—not a question. I nodded anyway. It felt pointless to bother denying it when the truth was probably written all over my face.

  “I haven’t had much of a dating life for the past few years. I just got sick of the whole process, which is part of the reason why I don’t bother going out.”

  “So, you’re pretty much saying that dating made you an introvert? Sounds about right to me,” I said with a snort.

  James cocked an eyebrow. “Sounds like there’s a story there.”

  “No, not really. Just… sounds right,” I said in an attempt to deflect his line of questioning.

  “Oh, come on. Everyone’s had at least one bad date, right? Or is that just what I tell myself so I can sleep at night?”

  I wanted to laugh at his self-deprecation, but I couldn’t. I was drawn in by the sight of his dimples, which faded away after a few moments with no reaction from me. He started to frown and I felt the overwhelming urge to tell him the truth. My mouth opened to speak before my brain had a chance to process what I was about to admit.

  “I’ve never been on a date.”

  His eyebrows shot up so fast it was almost comical. It probably would have been if I hadn’t admitted something so personal and embarrassing. I’d always been made to feel ashamed about my lack of interest in boys and dating—even by my so-called friends in school. Truth be told, I always wondered if something was wrong with me.

  Then I saw James for a whole five seconds and that fear went right out the window, only to be replaced by another, more insidious type. The fear of rejection.

  “Never?”

  “Never.”

  James narrowed his eyes and asked, “What’s your definition of a date?”

  “I know what you’re trying to get at, but no. The closest thing I ever had to a date was in eighth grade when a boy asked me to a school dance because he was afraid the girl he liked would say no. We went as friends.”

  “What about prom?”

  “I skipped it. I didn’t have a lot of friends by senior year and I didn’t want to feel like more of a loser than I already did.”

  James shook his head and blinked slowly, lips parted and a look of pure disbelief on his handsome features.

  “What about college? Did no one ask you out then?”

  “Well, a few guys asked, I just wasn’t interested.”

  “You’ve never been on a date,” he said, still clearly shocked. To my horror, his mind seemed to jump directly to the next conclusion, because he reared back with wide eyes as he said, “Wait. Does that mean you’ve never—”

  “Can we please stop right here?” I blurted, interrupting him. I’m sure my red cheeks answered his unspoken question well enough, judging by the horrified look on his face. “You probably have somewhere you need to be.”

  James cleared his throat and swallowed hard before nodding in agreement.

  “Right, right. I should… go.”

  I didn’t know what to say in response, so I stared down at my sandwich while I listened to him gathering his trash and walking away. The footsteps stopped close to the door and I braved a glance up to find him looking back at me with an odd expression.

  “I hope you’ll at least consider going to the party. It’d be nice to see you outside of work.”

  “I’ll think about it.”

  “Good. I’ll see you around, Piper.”

  He definitely would. Even though he now knew the truth about my lack of experience, I was already planning out possible outfits for the party in my head that I thought he might like. Virgin or not, I wanted him and I needed to at least try to make him want me back.

  Chapter 3

  There were no words to describe how grateful I was that Emily and I exchanged phone numbers on my first day of work. Early in the afternoon of the company party, I stumbled through her door with both arms full of clothes. I dropped them on the couch unceremoniously, making a ‘ta-da’ gesture as she watched me with raised eyebrows.

  “When you said you needed help choosing an outfit, I wasn’t expecting you to bring over your entire closet.”

  “Yeah, I need major help,” I muttered as I started to form piles of dresses, skirts, and tops. “I couldn’t even narrow it down myself. I’m not used to dressing for attention.”

  “Well, you called the right girl,” she said as she stepped up to help me shuffle the items around. “I still can’t believe nothing’s happened with you two yet.”

  “He’s been busy at work. I hardly ever see him.”

  “But you said he knows you’re a virgin. How’d that happen if you haven’t talked?”

  “We’ve had a grand total of one conversation.”

  “And that’s what you ended up talking about? Wow. One of you is very forward—not sure which, though.”

  I rolled my eyes and tossed a skirt at her. “It wasn’t like that. It kind of spiraled from one thing to another and onto dating in general and I just… I wanted to be honest, I guess.”

  “I’m just teasing you. I get it. Now let me take a look at what we’ve got…”

  She trailed off and we sorted through the items I brought over, eventually narrowing it down to two choices. She laid out the final options on top of the pile, humming thoughtfully as we took them both in.

  “Well, I know which one has my vote. Do you have a preference?”

  “I don’t know…” I said, trailing off as I held up the two dresses that made the cut. “Maybe I should have brought some pants or something. It’s cold out.”

  “The party’s inside, you’ll be fine,” she said, waving her hand through the air as if dismissing my concern. Before she could speak again, a set of footsteps approached from down the hall. “Perfect timing. Honey?”

  “Yeah?” David called as he entered the room. “Hey, Piper. Good to see you again.”

  Before I could respond to him, Emily held up the two dresses and said, “Piper’s trying to impress a guy at the party and we could use a man’s opinion. Got a preference? The green one is more Christmassy, but the black one—”

  “Is hotter,” David finished. “Go with the black.”

  Emily grinned so she must have had the same opinion. I deferred without protest, knowing I was already out of my element enough as it was. Emily started looking between the few pairs of shoes I brought while David turned to me with a smirk.

  “Trying to snag yourself a doctor?”

  “Not just a doctor. She’s trying to snag James.”

  His smile dropped immediately, a scowl taking its place. With a muttered curse that sounded an awful lot like ‘prick,’ he turned on his heel and marched out of the room, leaving me standing there completely confused.

  Emily must have sensed it because she said, “He doesn’t like James very much.”

  “Why not?”

  “It’s a long story. Come on. Let’s get started on our hair.”

  Standing in Emily’s bathroom fully dressed, I couldn’t help but be a little impressed. Not so much because of my appearance, but because of her mastery of creating the perfect outfit. She went above and beyond when she helped curl my hair in loose waves and did my makeup to be a little sexier than usual.

  All in all, I looked pretty good. I felt pretty good, too, until I looked behind me in the mirror and spotted her sitting on the edge of the tub, checking her phone for the hundredth time since I showed up.

  “Are you okay? You seem kind of anxious.”

  “Hm? Oh, I’m fine. Just checking to make sure my mom hasn’t texted me.”

  “Oh yeah. This is your first time being away from Marissa, isn’t it?”

  “Yeah. I figured there’d be some separation anxiety, but I didn’t think it’d make me this jittery. I mean, I know they only picked her up a few hours ago and they’re bringing her back tomorrow, but I still feel… weird. I don’t know. It’s hard to describe.”

  “I get that. And while I don’t personally have any experience, I do know that what you’re feeling is totally normal. She’ll be okay.”

  “I know,” she said with a smile. “I trust my parents to take care of her. Plus—even as nervous as I am—I’m really grateful to have a night off. Being a mom is hard.”

  “I bet.”

  “I’m also really glad you called me for this, by the way. I have to admit—it’s the first time I’ve ever been asked for help with guy trouble. Before my husband, I was just as inexperienced as you. It’s kind of nice to have a turn on the other side of things.”

  “Really? Were you a—”

  “Virgin? Yep.” I gaped at her and she shrugged. “What can I say? I knew he was the one and I didn’t want to settle for anything less.”

  “That’s what I’ve been waiting for.”

  “And what about James?” she asked, obviously fishing. “Do you think there might be true love potential there?”

  “It’d be pretty silly to even think about that yet. I barely know him,” I said, but it felt more like I was trying to convince myself of that rather than Emily.

  “Hey, I fell for David the first time I saw him. If you want to talk to anyone about love at first sight—I’m your girl. You won’t get any judgment from me.”

  “You have no idea how happy I am that we met,” I said dumbly, shaking my head in disbelief. “Seriously. I can’t even describe how much of a relief it is to know someone I actually have these things in common with.”

  “It’s pretty awesome, isn’t it?” Emily replied with a wide s
mile to match my own. Suddenly, she stood up and clapped her hands while bouncing on the balls of her feet. “Okay, now you got me all excited. Let’s wrap it up in here and go get our party on!”

  Despite Emily’s protest, David dropped us right by the door. It was way too cold to be outside with bare legs and we were both wearing dresses, though Emily’s was a little longer than mine. They took our coats as soon as we got inside and we waited nearby for David to finish parking while I nervously glanced around, hoping to spot James.

  Clara spotted us first. She came over wearing the leopard-print Santa hat she’d been talking about at work, greeting me cheerily before turning her attention to Emily and gushing about Marissa. David rejoined the group and Emily shooed me off once Clara was distracted by him. I slipped away unnoticed and into the next room.

  I knew that we were running late, but I didn’t realize how late until I looked around at the groups of people that had split apart and formed in separate areas of the large, open room. A few people I passed were at the point where they probably should have been cut off, but their glasses were full and they seemed to be in good spirits.

  Hoping that I hadn’t missed him, I waded through a sea of coworkers and people I didn’t know until I finally caught a glimpse of James standing near a group of other impeccably dressed men. They must have been some of the higher-ups at the hospital, but the only one I recognized was the supervisor that interviewed me. As I was trying to figure out how to slip myself into their conversation without being totally awkward, James frowned and looked up, catching my eye in an instant. After a few quiet words and a round of handshakes, he walked over to me.

  “You’re late.”

  “I know, I’m sorry.”

  “No need to apologize. I’m just glad you showed up.”

  “Me too,” I said with a smile that wavered when I glanced around and noticed a few people heading to the door. “I just wish I’d gotten here a little earlier.”

  “Don’t worry about it. You came with Emily, right?” I nodded and he grinned. “Yeah, I’m betting she was late on purpose. The speeches that kick off the party? Boring as hell. You didn’t miss anything good.”

  I took a deep breath for courage and strength before I said, “I was only worried about missing you.”

  The way his surprised smile made his eyes light up made my knees feel weak. I was surprised myself that I managed to say something so brazen without rambling on like a weirdo. Of course, thinking about the other things I’d said to him during our few previous conversations were enough to make my cheeks warm.

  Judging by the look on his face, I don’t think he noticed. Or maybe he did and he just didn’t want to embarrass me more.

  Either way, he leaned down and whispered, “Any chance you’d be willing to skip this whole thing? Maybe get some coffee or something instead?”

  “I-I’d like that,” I stammered, unsure of what else I could say. It felt weird to leave a party I just arrived at, but I couldn’t deny that I wanted to spend time with him alone. “Let me tell Emily I’m leaving and I’ll meet you by the door?”

  “Sounds good. I’ll meet you there in five.”

  As I walked back the way I came in, hoping Emily was still where I last saw her, my smile was so wide it almost made my cheeks sore. But who could blame me for being so excited?

  After all, I was about to go on my very first date.

  Chapter 4

  After opening the passenger door of his Mercedes for me and making sure I was settled in, James walked around the car and slipped into the driver’s seat. He took a long moment to regard me with narrowed eyes before he slid the key in the ignition.

  “You seem a little jittery,” he said as he started the engine. “How about we get something to eat instead of coffee?”

  “Both sound good,” I said, warming my hands in front of the heater. “I’m not really jittery, by the way. Just chilly.”

  His eyes locked onto my legs for a moment so brief that I would have missed it if I wasn’t staring at him so intently. He cleared his throat and reached over to mess with the dash controls, flooding the car with warmth a few moments later.

  “Better?”

  “Much better, thanks.”

  “Not really the best weather for a dress, is it?” he asked as his fingers made a gesture to the lightly falling snow through the windshield. He glanced once more at my legs and grinned as he added, “Not that I mind the view.”

  “Good to know.”

  I was surprised I could be so smooth, even though my voice did waver a little after his flirtatious words. I was grateful that the darkness in his car hid my blush. We rode in companionable silence until we got close to the central part of town where most of the restaurants were.

  “In the mood for anything in particular?”

  “Not really. I’m not a picky eater though so whatever you pick will be fine.”

  I was also new enough in town that I didn’t have a good feel on where the best places to eat were yet, but I was pretty sure James already knew that. Within five minutes, we were pulling into the parking lot of what appeared to be a diner. The lights were on inside, but the few cars in the lot and the not-so-great exterior gave me pause.

  “I know it doesn’t look like much, but the food here is spectacular.”

  “Really?”

  “Absolutely. I promise this isn’t me being a cheap date.”

  I froze in the middle of reaching for the car door handle.

  “So this is a date?”

  James froze as well. I could tell he regretted his choice of words. My heart clenched as he carefully mulled over his response. The longer he took, the less hopeful I felt.

  “It’s not that I don’t want it to be,” James said slowly, looking at me warily as he continued, “But it doesn’t really feel like one. I never officially asked you out, so it kind of feels like a cop-out to call this a date. That make sense?”

  “Are you—I mean, have you… thought about it?” I asked, almost afraid to hear his answer.

  “About asking you out?”

  “Yeah.”

  James ran a hand over his face and sighed. Something was going on in his head—something I felt had nothing to do with me—and it bugged me more than it should have that I wasn’t privy to whatever he was thinking. Which was insane for a whole lot of reasons.

  “I’ve thought about it. Frequently.”

  The admission itself made me happy, but the curt clip of his voice didn’t sit right. Before I could question it, James got out of the car. There wasn’t much else I could do but follow.

  “Oh my—you were right. You were so right,” I practically moaned around a bite of the best steak I’d ever tasted. “How did you find out about this place?”

  “I live nearby. I stopped in not long after I first moved here and it became my favorite. I’ve been a regular here for almost a decade now.”

  That explained why the staff was so kind to him. It didn’t explain why he was glancing around the building with a sad, pensive expression on his face. Not for the first time, I got the feeling that something was seriously wrong.

  The arrival of a refill stopped me before I could figure out how to ask. James declined the offer of dessert and looked to me with raised eyebrows.

  “I ate a little at the party, but if you’re still hungry and you like cheesecake, I would strongly suggest it.”

  I nodded and finished off my plate while we waited for my dessert to arrive. James sipped his coffee and watched me, making me blush yet again.

  “Will you stop that?”

  “Stop what?”

  “Watching me.”

  James cocked his head to the side and grinned. After a long moment of staring straight into my eyes, he shrugged and said, “Nope.”

  “No?” I gaped, grateful that I didn’t have a mouthful of food because my jaw literally dropped. “Why not?”

  “I like watching you.”

  “I… I don’t know how to respond to that.”

  “Good.” When I glared at him, he elaborated. “You’re so cute when you’re flustered. Your cheeks get all pink and your eyes go wide… it’s adorable.”

  “Well, you…” I trailed off, unable to shake the nervous fluttering in my stomach. With a small laugh, I said, “You must find me ‘cute’ a lot then. You fluster me very easily.”